I love love LOVE the episode Brooke Castillo released on The Life Coach School Podcast yesterday (listen here!).
I’ve noticed a pattern in some areas of my life where I have this thought of “That’s not my responsibility.”
Before hearing the aforementioned podcast episode, I was already sort of living in the question of, “What if I was taking full responsibility of this? What would that be like?” And “What if truly believed this was my responsibility? How would that change things?”
So, of course, it was so fun when this episode came out.
Here’s the bottom line…
All of our results are our responsibility.
When you’re thinking about the Model, you can tell what you’re thinking and feeling and doing by the results you have. That is not escapable, my friends.Brooke Castillo
And I want to pause here for a moment just to say that this is not to make you feel bad. On the contrary – this is the best news ever.
Because…if WE are the ones creating our results, then WE have the power to change them.
We can take responsibility without having to take “the blame.”
Blame is never useful.
Responsibility on the other hand? Totally empowering.
When you’re getting a negative result in your life, you’re getting a result that you don’t want, it’s just math. All you need to do is go up the Model to find what’s causing it. It’ll work every single time. Now, here’s the problem. We are super good at lying to ourselves. Our brains our super good at believing things that aren’t true. Believing things that don’t add up.
So here’s what I want to suggest that you do. I want to suggest that you look at the math of the Model to find out what you’re thinking and feeling. Because here’s the truth: sometimes you’re thinking stuff that you don’t want to be aware of.
Self-awareness is the first tool…learn how to watch your brain think. And, you’ll be overwhelmed with how many thoughts you’re actually thinking. There’s no way you can supervise all of your thoughts all of the time. You have about 65,000 a day. You’d have nothing else that you’d be able to do but sit around and watch yourself think. It’s not reasonable to do that.
The best way to know what you’re thinking is to look at the results in your life. Those are your most significant thoughts. This applies to all of the great things that you’re thinking, creating great results in your life, and all the not so great things that you’re thinking, creating not so great results in your life.Brooke Castillo
We don’t want to blame other people for our results. That is mixing models and that math doesn’t add up.
So your results are from your model, from your actions, from your thoughts, from your feelings. So one of the best ways for self-awareness is to look at the results in your life and make a list. Make sure you separate out the circumstances from your life, the things you can’t control, the things you didn’t create, and the results that you did create, that you can control.Brooke Castillo
What are some examples of results?
- Your weight
- Amount of money in your bank accounts
- Where you live
- Who you’re married to
- How many friends you have
- Your possessions
- Where you work
- The car you drive
- The clothes you wear
- The state of your house
- The state of your tax returns
- What your pantry looks like
- What your day looks like
- What your calendar looks like
- Your accomplishments
- Everything you’ve done
I really want you to be aware that a lot of times, we discount all of the amazing results we’ve created because we’re trying to beat ourselves up. And I want you to be aware that this is something that you might be tempted to do and not do it, but I also want you to look at it as if it’s just math. These are the results that I’ve created because I’ve thought positive thoughts, and these are the results I’ve created because I’ve thought negative thoughts.Brooke Castillo
And this is where we can circle back to some of the thoughts I’ve been having. Because when I’m thinking that it’s not really my responsibility to make something happen, I end up with a feeling of abdication, and as a result, I don’t create the results I’d like to see in my life.
It doesn’t serve me to think about it that way.
So, the thought I’ve been loving since then?
My results are my responsibility.
I make things happen.
If it is to be, it is up to me.
Where in your life are you not taking responsibility?
What would it be like if you were taking responsibility? How would things change?